“For your heart will always pursue what you esteem as your treasure.” Matthew 6:21 TPT
This might be the most vulnerable blog that I have written yet, but I promised myself that I would be honest, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. One thing I want to be clear about is that this post is not about sexual pleasure; this is not the space nor the proper audience for a conversation on that. This is about the pleasures of life, i.e. the things that bring us satisfaction. Even though the word pleasure is often used in correlation to sex, there are many non-sexual things we find pleasure in. This includes music, media (TV, social media), gossip (The Shade Room, Larry Reid Live), etc. And by now you know that I am a woman who enjoys understanding the proper definition of words, so let’s look at what the word pleasure means. The word pleasure as a noun, according to the Oxford Dictionary, means a feeling of happy satisfaction and enjoyment. So like I said before, there are so many things that we take pleasure in. Pleasure in and of itself is not a bad thing; what makes it harmful is how we desire it and how our desires for it impact our decision-making.
As a heads up, this blog is going to be a little Bible-heavy because I wanted to make sure that I understood why God put this in my heart to talk about. The first scripture that I found is Proverbs 21:17, which talks about how those who love pleasure shall be poor (paraphrased). In 1 Timothy 5:6, it talks about how she who lives with her pleasures is dead while she lives (paraphrased). These are some very direct and hard-hitting scriptures, and as I read them again I found a pattern. The Bible does not speak directly against pleasure; it speaks directly against loving and centering pleasure. It’s the love of pleasure that makes us poor; it’s living in pleasure that causes us to be dead. And what is most striking to me is that many of our pleasures are not sinful on their own, but it’s how they are used. Just like an idol can be anything that we put above God, seeking our own pleasures can become both an idol and they can be the doorway for the enemy to come in.
I’ll share some examples of common pleasures that so many of us struggle with. I’ll start with a personal example. I love music, and I listen to music at least once every day. I especially love R&B music, but I have to be careful listening to it because it can influence my thoughts and my actions. To be honest, I have no business listening to R&B music when I ain’t got no man, but that’s beside the point. I recognize that I find satisfaction in music, that it is something that calms me down when I am upset, anxious, or sad. Many of us find also pleasure in shopping, or as my mom likes to call it “retail therapy”. While there is nothing wrong with shopping occasionally (insert the fabulous Donna Meagle saying “treat yourself”), shopping should not be a replacement for dealing with your feelings. Last but not least is one of the biggest pleasures of all, food. I once had a friend ask me to name a major life event that does not include food, and I could not think of a single one. We eat at weddings, baby showers, birthday parties, housewarming parties, anniversaries, graduations, and especially at funerals (black folks love us a good repast meal). We’re told by society that food correlates with celebration, and we’ve made it acceptable as a way to deal with negative emotions. Think about all the movies and TV shows that stereotypically showed food being used to deal with emotions (eating chocolate during your period, eating ice cream after a breakup, stuffing your face when you’re sad). It’s something that’s always around us and always accessible and something we have to be aware of and honest about.
Now am I saying that music, shopping, and food are sinful? Not even close. But what I am saying is that when those things become what we strive after, when they become what we need to survive and get through life, that’s when they’re harmful. That’s when they become our treasure, and that brings us back to the original scripture at the top of this post. When we treasure something we hold it in our heart, and we seek it out. We must realize that there’s always going to be evidence of what we treasure in our lives. If you treasure food as a comfort, the evidence is going to be weight gain. This is why millions of Americans struggle with overeating and yo-yo dieting; it’s because even though we understand the importance of a healthy lifestyle our heart treasures the comfort that food gives. I read a report yesterday that said that America has the highest amount of credit card debt in US history, and that is evidence that Americans treasure material things. This year they are predicting the highest volume of travelers in a single summer at airports across the country. We treasure escaping from our current reality. Now the why behind what we treasure is nuanced, but it’s important to know that if we don’t take the time to self-identify what’s at the root of our pleasures, they will eventually become the most important thing in our lives, even more important than God is. In 2 Timothy 3:4, it calls out traitors, heady, high-minded people, who are lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God (paraphrased). When we choose our treasures over His word, we put Him in second place in our hearts.
When I first began to get serious about God I felt like God took away everything that I enjoyed. First He made me give up drinking (after I had bought some new wine), then He told me to break up with my then-boyfriend and be celibate, then He had me get involved with serving in my church, and before you know it I started to feel like a different person, and I was worried. I felt like I was doing the right things on paper but I wasn’t having that much fun anymore. And if I’m honest, I believe that some of the pleasures that I currently struggle with began as ways of comforting myself in my new identity. I’m feeling bored……. let’s online shop! I know God told me to break up with them, but I still miss him and I can’t sleep……..so I’ll drive around and grab a quick bite. Harmless enough, right? But it wasn’t harmless. I was slowly and quietly centering my own pleasures and comforts instead of just being honest with God and asking for wisdom on what I should do. So now I am doing just that. And guess what I am learning?
God has plans to give us pleasure if we will just walk with Him! Psalm 16:11 says “Because of you, I know the path of life, as I taste the fullness of joy in your presence. At your right side I experience divine pleasures for evermore” (TPT). It will only be because of God that we will experience the fullness of joy. It won’t be because of another outfit, another relationship, another degree, or another achievement. Our treasure has to be God. It’s not only what He wants, but it’s what our hearts are truly longing for, deep down. The reason why we are susceptible to the pleasures of this life is because we’re seeking to fill something that only God can. And please understand that even as I write this I recognize my own inconsistencies and the contradictions in my own behavior. But I am now aware of one more thing that’s on the other side of my obedience, and I pray that I can surrender my pleasures and have God as my true treasure. That’s my honest prayer for all of us; that we realize that what our hearts desire, we already have.
I’ll leave us with a passage of Scripture that’s a reminder about the weight that we give our pleasures versus their actual worth.
“I said to myself, come now, I will test you with pleasure to find out what is good. But it also proved to be meaningless. Laughter, I said, is madness. And what does pleasure accomplish? I tried to myself with wine, and embracing folly-My mind still guiding me with wisdom. I wanted to see what was good for people to do with the heavens during the few days of their lives. I undertook great projects: I built houses for myself and planted vineyards. I made gardens and parks and planted all kinds of fruit trees in them. I made reservoirs to water groves of flourishing trees. I bought male and female slaves and had other slaves who were born in my house I also own more herds and flocks and anyone in Jerusalem before me I am as silver and gold for myself, and the treasure of kings and provinces. I acquired male and female singers, and a harem as well- the delights of a man’s heart. I became greater by far than anyone in Jerusalem before me. In all this, my wisdom stayed with me. I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my labor, and this was the reward for all my toil. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun.” Ecclesiastes 2: 1-11 (NIV)
See y’all next week~
The Obedience Diaries 